By A.C.S.

Everywhere and nowhere: home is no place.
Clicks. Belts fastened tomato juice sloshing.
Searching for the soul, an exhaustive chase.
Deep corners of the Earth thumbtacks squashing.

Few precious hours sweet purgatory.
Nauseously shaking, cold sweats, hot flashes.
No excitement that’s not mandatory.
Rare moments of peace misty eyelashes.

Between worlds, clutching neither time nor needs,
clammy hands grasp old baggage; last to stand.
Blonde curls, pockets full of sunflower seeds.
Turbulent past brings nostalgic disband.

Aggravating truths; one longs to be whole.
Stability? The clouds achieve this goal.


My Story

I find the past too beautiful to forget. I have no intention of re-living it, nor am I seriously contemplating the possibility of time travel…but rather, I would like to use words to bring memories and images back to life. I long to be able to explain, describe, and illustrate the indescribable 25 years I’ve spent so far on this Earth—and I hope by doing so I will gain some perspective on the unclear, closure on the painful and delight of the wonderful.

Starting this is one of the hardest things I’ve done so far, especially without some sort of background information or cheesy introduction going something like: “Hey guys, I’m so and so! And I’m a Third Culture Kid! I’ve moved around a lot and have some great stories to tell!”

While yes…this cheerful statement is definitely true, it is so shallow, so primitive, and puts me and my existence into some sort of classification, label and fence. I don’t want to be labeled. Or Classified. I want to write freely, for you all, snippets and traces of my memories, and you can classify me however you like.

A generic (but also true) ‘About me’ would be that I gain inspiration from music, God, the fascinations of nature, the beautiful literary or creative works of others and let’s not forget that most important…and most obvious: PLACES--Places I’ve lived, places I feel like I’ve lived…places my parents grew up in, full of stories that I can so vividly imagine...etc.

I have absolutely no idea if I’m lost or if I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. 

Archangelskoye Estate, Russia--November 2015

Please, dear readers, enjoy this blog--a place for creative writing, for beautiful images, and nostalgic memory.